Money quote for the dating chapter?

Christian > Bill > Ean 3/15/2004

from: Ean
to: friends of friends
subject: Win a date with Schuessler!

message: Someone just gave me box seats to the Missy Elliot / Beyonce concert here in Dallas, Texas. I’ve called all the single hotties that I can think of and no one is picking up their phone.

Their loss is your gain. If you are an attractive chick in the DFW area then answer this message with all possible haste. First single, hot lady to message me wins box seating and charming companionship.

Message me now!

(Is this Spam? Is it an unsolicited advertisement for a date? Since I own the tickets and I’m giving them to a lady for free does that waive the commercialness? Am I selling tickets in exchange for a hot date? Does a hot lady count as renumeration? I can’t decide. Give me your opinion!)