During that intense period, tween 7 and 9 am, after waking up once to let the cat out (didn’t notice she had shat on a chair) and getting up for real, I had a series of vivid dreams, including one of those ones in which you know you’ve been asleep and dreaming but think you’ve just woken up and don’t notice anything surreal, such as, in this case, the fact that my dad was for some reason sitting at my computer desk (he lives 3000 miles away), and that instead of his short white hair and mustache he had lanky black hair and a black mustache. I recall teasing him about dying his hair and discussing how I had been dreaming but was now awake. I don’t know what any of it means but I rarely if ever dream about the man despite the fact that he looms large in my psyche, so this feels like something important pushing toward the surface. Discussing it with B tonight all i could fix on was that he was some kind of hip/hippie version of my real dad. Wish fulfillment?