John Kerry’s first true test

· long story short reports that Chevy Chase and Jon Voight will be starring in an upcoming film called “The Karate Dog.”
But wait: The Karate Kid’s Pat Morita co-stars.
But wait: It’s from the director of Baby Geniuses. And the writer of The Million Dollar Kid, which was that rarest of rare flowers: a Corey Feldman / Estelle Getty vehicle.
Did I mention? Chevy plays the voice of Cho-Cho. Who I have to assume is the dog. So fine. The presidential race is now well and truly on. And we have two candidates — John Kerry and George Bush — each battle-tested in their own way. Sorta.
But the past is the past. And this is a campaign about the future. A future that’s looking increasingly grim. A future in which every day drags us 24 hours closer to this film’s inevitable release on DVD.
And the question I’ve got to ask is: who will stand up to this madness? Which candidate has to the courage to stare Evil in its one squinty eye? For make no mistake, this is Evil. And it must be stopped. Before I’m forced to add it to my netflix queue.