RNC: Quick takes

Arnold? Pretty entertaining. But I kept waiting for him to tell us why it was we should reelect Bush. Sure, we got plenty of reasons why America’s great. And let there be no doubt: If the USA and all the positive things it can stand for in this world are ever on the ballot, they’ve collectively got my vote. (also: Wooo!) But what I was looking for were a few positive attributes or policies or actions related to this particular president. I got a grand total of one: “he’s quite decisive.” And you know what? So is that gorilla that learned ASL. When she wants an apple, boy, she really wants an apple. But I ain’t letting Koko hold The Button.
The so-called “Bush twins”? They put the “train wreck” in “holy crap! I just saw a train wreck!” Even the Fox “All-Stars” (and speaking of them: [insert vomity noise here]) thought these two were a disaster. I’m sure it doesn’t really matter to the actual election. And I’m not gonna tear them apart, because it ain’t their fault. But yeeesh. Whoever wrote and approved those speeches managed to make Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie look like Mother Teresa and the Dalai Lama. In comparison. Which is not an easy thing to do. Because Paris Holton and Nicole Ritchie really aren’t very deep. Or at least, they don’t seem very deep on the TV. And neither did the so-called “Bush twins.” Tonight. Was my impression.
GWB’s introduction of Laura? So boring the people (I assume being paid to stand behind him and look like they’re casually playing softball) couldn’t even be bothered to stop playing softball long enough to look over. Now that’s charisma!
Mrs. Bush? Not bad, actually. A little dull. Sure, she stretched the truth at points (“my husband is actually at home doing stem cell research right now! using real live babies!”) But credit where credit’s due: she was pretty specific, she was fairly positive, she seemed reasonably sane. A solid B+. Too bad she’s not running for office.


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2 responses to “RNC: Quick takes”

  1. Itto Ogami Avatar
    Itto Ogami

    could have mentioned that AHHnold is a stupid, bad and very sexist man. it is unfortunate that AHHnold represents austria to many americans (i.e., those americans that know he is austrian and know that austria is a country, and could locate austria on a map), because i’ve been to austria and it is quite beautiful and the people were quite nice. i highly recommend
    “The best activities for your health are pumping and humping.”
    Arnold Schwarzenegger
    “My friends don’t want me to mention Kurt’s name, because of all the recent Nazi stuff and the U.N. controversy, but I love him and Maria does too, and so thank you, Kurt.”
    Arnold Schwarzenegger on his friend and fellow Austrian Kurt Waldheim, a Nazi war criminal
    and on and on…
    “I don’t understand how they can call me anti-Latino, when I’ve made four movies in Mexico.”
    Arnold Schwarzenegger
    this toilet bowl. How many times do you get away with this, to take a woman, grab her upside down, and bury her face in a toilet bowl? I wanted to have something floating there … The thing is, you can do it, because in the end, I didn’t do it to a woman, she’s a machine! We could get away with it without being crucified by who-knows-what group.”
    Arnold Schwarzenegger describing a scene in Terminator 3

  2. Dumpster Avatar
    Dumpster

    On the subject of Arnold, and while the topic of admirably hard-nosed campaign tactics is in the air, let’s take a stroll down memory lane.
    When, late in the recall campaign last fall, the LA Times ran its story with all the independent accounts of pawing incidents, Arnie’s campaign manager Sean Walsh didn’t get mad; he got even. One of the accusers was a stuntwoman or actress named (IIRC) Rhonda Williams. Walsh e-mailed friendly media outlets that an arrest record for a Rhonda Williams could be found at such-and-such URL. Only problem was, it wasn’t the same Rhonda Williams, as they would have seen if they had checked details like date of birth. But being friendly media, they didn’t, and ran with the item. She later sued, but I don’t know what the outcome was.
    Walsh said, “we did it because we could.” O-nay it-shay.
    On election night, local (SF) TV news talking heads were opining that the Times had “gone too far” in reporting unfavorable information about the Republican candidate and should somehow be “punished.” Of course, that was pointless because being consigned to irrelevance is punishment enough for print media.
    Today, of course, “because we could” is pretty much the official RNC justification for the Swift Boat smear campaign. “Go f— yourself; we’re getting away with this, and there’s nothing you can do about it” — that’s pretty much what they mean when Dole says “golly, all those Republicans can’t be liars” and Poppy Bush follows up with “…and how dare you call Bob Dole a liar.”
    Please, tell me I’m wrong; tell me that tens of millions of likely voters in swing states have been adequately informed that military records and numerous firsthand reports contradict the transparently fraudulent charges, etc. etc.