Category: Handy Retort

  • developing: President Bush is a habitual onanist

    On the eve of the first presidential debates, some say President Bush has developed an unhealthy addiction to onanism. Sources close to the President have recently noticed that his hands are never more than 6 feet from his guy-parts. Never. Not during cabinet meetings. Not playing with his dog. Not watching “Jimmy Kimmel” on the…

  • Handy Retort #3

    Another snappy answer for Cecil’s collection: “Wrong leadership is not strong leadership.” (TM Orcinus, which is having a helluva fine blogging week and where you should read the entire post, including the very long litany of “Just remember: It wasn’t Democrats who…”)

  • Handy Retort #2

    Have you been following the whole forgery thing? (Short version: new docs surfaced yesterday with more national guard-related badness for Bush. Today’s news has some experts saying these docs are really forgeries because of particulars re the typeface.) OK, so what if one of your Republican buddies stops you in the hallway tomorrow and says:…

  • Handy Retort #1

    Going into the home stretch here, we’re all going to need to have some snappy retorts on-hand. For example, if you’re pro-Kerry, the next time a Republican brags to you about the polls and the convention, and blah, blah, blah, try this: “Yeah, Bush is really running a great campaign. It’s just his presidency that…