Marcus O'Riley renames his column

· Salon Bloggers

Your
Salon Blog Tour of Quality

‘Tis
a sad day’, as Marcus O’Riley would have said, at least he would’ve
until we fired his sorry ass. It was not his insufferable rudeness
that did him in, nor his propensity at mangling the English language.
No, and let this be a lesson to all you young people out there, but
it was the fact that he lied on his job application. We specifically
asked for an Irish writer, and now we discover that he was Belgian
all along. Perhaps we were fooled by his liberal use of ‘O, but we
should have known better when we realized he preferred Finlandia to
Guinness. Beginning immediately, we are making big changes. For example,
the new title, which replaces the absurd Salon
Blog Quality Tour for You.

Exclusive:
In other mind-boggling news, we have discovered that Jan Haugland
is able to write using letters
not found on the human keyboard!

If you like reading
the daily obituary columns nearly as much as I do, you’ll love Daniel
O’Neil’s
Googobits
. I profess a genuine fondness for his logo.

In related
news,
Miss Feva
is already contemplating her Christmas card list…

No Code
jumps into the cooking fray. “It’s a new month and that means a new
page in my
SPAM
calendar!” he starts, before spilling out a delicious sounding
recipe for ‘SPAM and Limas’. Yum yum. But, uh David, today is November
12…

In other
cooking news,
Julie
describes a Veteran’s Day meal which sounds even better
than David’s. Hard to believe, I know.

different
strings
fearlessly takes on the difficult topic of fat NFL officials.

Standing
Room Only
. Little Tykes Talking Vanity. Need we say more?

Earth
on Life
digs
up a strange gilded box. No wait,
Life on Earth
digs up a strong golden box with a strange massage.

In closing,
as Marcus would have said, had we not fired his sorry ass, ‘Well,
then, Goodnight from Marcus, your guide to Salon Quality.’
Except
now it’s just Goodnight.