Iraq Is Free! Rejoice!!

Hooray!! Iraq is now a free, sovereign nation! Let me repeat that because it just sounds so sweet…
Iraq is free!!!
What a blessed day! I woke to the news yesterday morning and ran out into the street, heart and bathrobe aflutter, waiting for the throngs to join me in spontaneous celebration…
Hmm. Well, it was early, so maybe the neighbors hadn’t heard yet. I went back inside to watch the spontaneous celebrations that the free, democratic Iraqi people clearly must have been enjoying and the news channels must have been broadcasting…
Well, maybe al Jazeera is suppressing it or something. Anyway, you all must be as totally PSYCHED as I am that Iraq is now free and sovereign!
Three cheers for the newly Democratic, Sovereign, Iraq!
Hip hip….hooray!!!!!
Hip hip….hooray!!!!!
Hip hip….hooray!!!!!
C’mon people! What the hell’s wrong with you all? This is a glorious day! The beginning of world democracy and the beginning of the end of evil as we know it!!!
Get hyped you bastards!!!!
Oh, forget it.